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Alcohol...ism
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Contributors to this thread:
Will 20-Sep-18
HDE 20-Sep-18
JTV 20-Sep-18
Woods Walker 20-Sep-18
JTV 20-Sep-18
Woods Walker 20-Sep-18
NvaGvUp 20-Sep-18
KSflatlander 20-Sep-18
mn_archer 21-Sep-18
WV Mountaineer 21-Sep-18
JTV 21-Sep-18
Crusader dad 21-Sep-18
HDE 21-Sep-18
Owl 21-Sep-18
jjs 21-Sep-18
Will 21-Sep-18
Owl 21-Sep-18
JTV 21-Sep-18
KSflatlander 21-Sep-18
TD 21-Sep-18
mn_archer 21-Sep-18
AccMan 21-Sep-18
Crusader dad 21-Sep-18
KSflatlander 21-Sep-18
AccMan 21-Sep-18
ICON 21-Sep-18
HA/KS 21-Sep-18
Wapitidung 25-Sep-18
Amoebus 25-Sep-18
Crusader dad 26-Sep-18
Amoebus 26-Sep-18
WV Mountaineer 26-Sep-18
Will 26-Sep-18
Hunting5555 26-Sep-18
mn_archer 26-Sep-18
Hunting5555 26-Sep-18
Amoebus 26-Sep-18
SB 01-Oct-18
Mint 02-Oct-18
WV Mountaineer 02-Oct-18
Will 02-Oct-18
Scar Finga 02-Oct-18
Crusader dad 10-Feb-19
bad karma 10-Feb-19
HA/KS 10-Feb-19
KSflatlander 10-Feb-19
Dale06 10-Feb-19
Owl 10-Feb-19
slade 10-Feb-19
jjs 10-Feb-19
From: Will
20-Sep-18
Sorry folks, sort of a PSA here...

Over the last couple years, I've, regrettably, had to go to a couple funerals for men in thier early 40s, the last on hit 40, 2 weeks ago. They had wives, jobs, kids. But they couldn't put the bottle down, drinking themselves into organ failure and death. Not from one wild night, but from daily drinking, which they couldn't stop.

I've never liked the taste of alcohol, so I've never been a drinker. Just not my thing. But seeing these families ripped apart due to booze, it sucks!

If you cant finish a day, have a good time, or feel good without a drink... please talk to your health care provider and make sure you are ok, and that alcohol isnt running you.

From: HDE
20-Sep-18
Everything in moderation, too much of anything is never good.

From: JTV
20-Sep-18
I was never a big drinker, occasional beer with pizza, a Margarita before a good mexican dinner, a beer after a 10 mile run on a hot ass day .... heck I drank more in the Marines or in high school at keggers.... now, I cant drink any alcohol much if at all ... my prostate has seen to that (BPH) .. Gave up sodas 8 yrs back because of it also .. Ive seen what being a heavy drinker had done to guys I knew... they are now dead .. all I drink now is water and sun tea (no sugar) .....

From: Woods Walker
20-Sep-18
I like a cold bottle of beer every now and then, but if I never had another I wouldn't miss it. I wish I could say the same for high quality (MILKFAT!) ice cream!

There's a locally owned/produced dairy store chain around here...Oberweis....(in fact the founder's son, Jim, is my State Senator....and a decent one too) who's ice cream is SO good that when it melts it's still thick enough to just about stand a spoon up in!

From: JTV
20-Sep-18
Yep, Oberweis is some good stuff ... we have it here across the line ..

From: Woods Walker
20-Sep-18
Yup! And unlike Ben and Jerry's, it's not owned by hypocritical commie/socialist dickweeds, but an actual local businessman and his family!

From: NvaGvUp
20-Sep-18
I think Ben and Jerry sold their business years ago

From: KSflatlander
20-Sep-18
My step-children almost lost their dad to that horrible disease addiction. He’s been sober for over 4 years now. He says he still fights the addiction but it’s getting easier. Very happy to see him in a good place and his relationship with our kids recover also. There is hope out there for those who want it. Hopefully they reach bottom and want to change before it’s too late. I know you can’t make an alcoholic change. They have admit there is a problem and want to fix it. Alcohol destroys more families than anything out there. Go light on the stuff.

From: mn_archer
21-Sep-18
how the hell do you drink so much that you have major organ failure in your 40's?

21-Sep-18
I used to enjoy the taste of it from time to time. However, it’s getting more rare though that I actually find myself choosing one with a steak etc.....

I used to be an alcoholic. Bad. For a decade. Gave myself to the Lord, and lost that addiction easily. I went for years without touching it. Then got into drinking one occasionally with dinner. I simply don’t like it much anymore.

From: JTV
21-Sep-18
Some are prone to it, like drug addiction .... not my favorite actor, but Ben Afflect is in alch. rehab now for the 3rd time ... he may lose his role as Batman in the DC Justice League movies because of this ... its said it would cost a fortune to insure him now

From: Crusader dad
21-Sep-18
I had the world by the balls. Hot wife, great kids, nice house and boat. But, I love to drink. I always have but I always went to work and took care of my responsibilities. I drank pretty much every day but life was still pretty good.

Then I started my own business. I immediately tripled my income and doubled my freedom. That's a bad combo for a guy that likes to drink and gamble. I didn't see it happening but before I knew it, alcohol had completely taken over. I was only working enough to cover my bills but then I'd spend the bill money on alcohol. Every day I'd wake up and tell myself "GO TO WORK" but every day I'd find myself at the golf course with a case of beer. I'd golf all day long until I ran out of beer. Then drive home drunk and tell my amazing wife to go fuck herself when she'd yell at me about it. Then winter came and I had more bills than money. I chose to use what little money I had to try and win more by gambling instead of just going to work and slowly paying my bills off. Of course I'd get shitface drunk at the casino too, then drive home drunk and argue with my wife.

I had spiraled completely out of control. I was lying to everyone who loves me. I HATED who I'd become but for some reason I still couldn't stay sober for more than a day. I'd become everything I told myself I'd never be and everything I hated in other men.

Feb 16, 2018 I'd had a particularly bad drunk. Normally I'd have just driven home and dealt with a pissed off wife but for some reason I called my son for a ride. He didn't come get me though. He called my cousin a local cop and had him bring me to my moms house. That morning I finally had a moment of clarity.

I'd had enough. I had my mom bring me home and when I saw my wife and the tearful bags under her eyes I completely broke down. I confessed all my lies. I told her about my debt. I told her I was finally ready to change. That morning I went to my first AA meeting.

It was scary walking into that meeting but I knew I had to. I'd tried a million times to quit, control it, cut back all to no avail. A woman sitting next to me looked over, touched my arm and with a warm welcoming smile simply said "it will get better ". I left that meeting with something I hadn't had in a long time,,,,,,hope. I went to another meeting that night, and another the next morning. Lots of meetings that first week. Somehow I was able to stay sober! I still go to at least 3/4 meetings a week. I haven't had a drink since feb 16. I do what the folks around those tables suggest I do. They have happiness and serenity. I wanted that too.

I've busted my ass working since then and have managed to pay off $21,000 in debt. I have $2,500 left and I'll owe no one anything! My wife is back in love with me! My kids are free of stress at home and can concentrate on their schooling. My business is booming again.

I still miss my beer, I still love it. I now have the tools I need to be able to not drink it though. I am more busy than I've ever been but I have found my inner peace. I know that I'll never be able to have even one more drink as long as I'm alive and I'm thankful I don't have to. I was on the precipice of losing everything I loved and now I have so much more!

That little old woman was sooo right. It does get better!!! Thanks for letting me share my story.

Shane Honore' Alcoholic

From: HDE
21-Sep-18
Good story Shane, thanks for sharing

From: Owl
21-Sep-18
"how the hell do you drink so much that you have major organ failure in your 40's?"

I have a friend in his early 30s that did nearly that. He would drink an 18 pack a day. One more who got acute pancreatitis from frequent binge drinking while in college.

I have my history with alcohol. When I was a college student, I came to believe in the multiverse because I figured there was no way I survived the previous night. I figured there had to be a dimension where I rightfully died... That should put it in perspective. Anyway, at 47 and much healthier than I was in college, I have come to believe, if there is no biological imperative for a substance, I'd sooner do without. I suspect there is no "moderate level" of an acute or chronic toxin. Life is good.

21-Sep-18
I used to joke with my friends who drank a lot that they were alcoholics but I really didn't know what that meant until I saw someone drink themselves to death at an early age. It's a horrible addiction. I'm doubt I even drink once a month now but I can still drink pretty good if I set my mind to it. I'm nothing like I was in college though.....I could drink a 30 pack in a single day no problem back when I was playing Rugby in the 1980s and I pretty much drank beer 6 days a week.

21-Sep-18
Shane. I should have said...nice post! I know a couple of other people with similar stories.....it's great to see it work out good! Inspiration for someone I hope.

From: jjs
21-Sep-18
Lost 2 high school buds that died in their early 40s from ETOH. Spent 5 yrs in the VA medical center (med/pysch) and over 80% of the vets there was from ETOH complication. Brandy drinkers usually had dementia and whisky/vodka had liver damage, my drinking consumption drop off considerable. Use to tell folks with kids that were drinking to take them to the VA to see the end results of chronic ETOH drinking, not a good experience.

From: Will
21-Sep-18
Those of you who have overcome it, CD and WV and anyone else... Amazing and well done! Amazing the damage it can do, on the individual level, and certainly to the well being of those around you.

From: Owl
21-Sep-18
I also believe “ light” social drinking is a contributing factor to metabolic syndrome and the litany of pathologies that follow.

From: JTV
21-Sep-18
Shane, congrats on getting it together ... dont cave now .... super work !!

From: KSflatlander
21-Sep-18
Amazing story Shane. The mountains u had to climb to get were u are now is truly remarkable. How long did it take before u felt nominal again...I mean physically?

From: TD
21-Sep-18
What about light anti-social drinking? =D

From: mn_archer
21-Sep-18
Shane. you have balls. That actually brought a little tear to my eye and that's not good. Friday afternoons I take off early to bring our 4 year old daughter to dance class. I'm the only dude in a room of 24 moms and 25 young daughters!

Your story is very familiar to me but without the nice ending. I seen from a very young age what alcohol can do to a family and after 42 years of marriage my parents divorced, largely because of it. Also my favorite person ever- my uncle Charlie (we named our son Charlie) died of lung cancer in his 50's.

I've never smoked anything in my life and I RARELY drink alcohol. My wife and I went on a vacation last October to California and i had some wine during a wine tour- nothing since.

My problem is i have some wires crossed in my brain and i easily become addicted to things- regardless of what it is. I got into archery elk hunting for a bit and killed 15 elk in 10 years. Took up fur trapping pretty seriously and now own thousands of traps. I got into shooting 3 gun competitions and now could cover my mortgage for several years with the competition guns I have- and I have a new fully customized benelli m2 shipping out any day.

No matter what new hobby i find i somehow take it to extremes. I see it happening but I'm not going into debt and I'm not lying to my wife about it. I know for a fact I would be an awesome drunk- and fear of my wife and kids seeing me go down that rabbit hole helps keep me away from alcohol.

Thanks for sharing your story Shane and I wish you the best. By the way, Tuesday is the 34th anniversary of my uncle Charlie's passing.

Michael

From: AccMan
21-Sep-18
Shane your story is a true inspiration, stay on your present course.

I grew up with alcoholic parents, and began to follow in their footsteps. I drank alot and when returning from Vietnam I stayed in a drunken stupor for about 10 years. I then woke up one morning and decided I had had enough and wanted to make something of myself. I quit, went back to school and made a success of myself whereas I could have just fallen down the rabbit hole and probably be dead by now. I am 67 and have lost many good friends to alcoholism and daily see many that are still reeling from that dreaded disease.

From: Crusader dad
21-Sep-18
KS, the physical withdrawals lasted about 6 days. The shaking stopped after about 10 days. Another few months of constant mental battles. Now, physically I am stronger than I've ever been. Mentally, I still struggle but it's easier than it was. I am able to focus on the good that's happening in my life and that keeps me motivated.

From: KSflatlander
21-Sep-18
Very happy for u. A great story that’s not finished yet. And u still have the hot wife. Nice!

From: AccMan
21-Sep-18
Shane your story is a true inspiration, stay on your present course.

I grew up with alcoholic parents, and began to follow in their footsteps. I drank alot and when returning from Vietnam I stayed in a drunken stupor for about 10 years. I then woke up one morning and decided I had had enough and wanted to make something of myself. I quit, went back to school and made a success of myself whereas I could have just fallen down the rabbit hole and probably be dead by now. I am 67 and have lost many good friends to alcoholism and daily see many that are still reeling from that dreaded disease.

From: ICON
21-Sep-18
Alcoholics Anonymous is s excellent group to be associated with. Yes, it does take a person to hit rock bottom to even begin to think about getting help for a very forgetful disease.

The reason why it is forgetful is that as time goes by a person forgets the feeling of the bottom. AA meetings are the reminder. I do not attend AA meetings presently because a sober alcoholic preaching its values is as annoying as any practicing drunk. To intentionally run AA into the ground is not my goal. It is a glorious way to meet people that do not want to drink daily. What they teach is that your drinking friends are not your friends. Which i cannot totally agree with other than the fact that staying away from your drinking friends keeps you out of the atmosphere of alcohol. Since most of you might think I am totally crazy by my threads you might be partially correct. I threatened a Judge on the Chief Deputy's email address in my county of residence about 3 and a half years ago. I made an NGRI defense and did 3 years and 3 months locked up on a 5 year bit. 2 years and 3 months were spent in a forensic state mental hospital. The point I am attempting to make is that the time taught me that I could enjoy playing cards, chess, dominoes, and other leisure activities without the buzz that I thought I enjoyed for the better part of my life. I am having the most fun of my life without having to have a beer in my hand. Yes, I would firmly recommend that if a person has enough humility to say alcohol has beaten me for the last time it is necessary to humble oneself to walk through the AA doors daily for the sickening reminder of where you have been and where you could end up with insanity of alcohol abuse. It is an extremely personal decision not to pick up. Sober or not alcoholics can be very crafty and to finally stop lieing to oneself is a big secret to staying sober.

From: HA/KS
21-Sep-18
Wow.

Due to too many alcoholics in my family (my parents were about the only sober ones) I decided while still in grade school that I wouldn't drink or smoke. Great decision on my part.

I think I would have been as bad as anyone I knew or anyone here. I'm not great at quitting an addiction.

Thanks to everyone who has bared their soul here. Hopefully it helps someone realize they are in trouble, or avoid getting into an alcoholic mess.

From: Wapitidung
25-Sep-18
15+ years clean and sober. Thank God.

Wapitidung

From: Amoebus
25-Sep-18
Crusader - that was a tough read. I have never drank (after seeing the effect it had on my brother) but could feel the inspiration within. I was under the impression that the stroke (I think that it was you) was your rock bottom - even more impressive that you are better based on your own will (with lots of help from AA, etc).

I remember a thread that I cannot find now where I remember you and Kelly Harris both professing how much you drank on a weekend. I was more than a little amazed that someone could drink that much day after day. I believe that is was shortly thereafter that you had your stroke and Kelly passed this year. I also remember a comment from the thread where you said that you could drink that much and it didn't affect your loved ones. I thought at the time I wondered if your wife thought the same? Your latest post answered all those questions - thank you for that. I am sure that your wife and son(s) are also appreciative of your change. Keep it up for life.

From: Crusader dad
26-Sep-18
Amoebus, my stroke was like a catalyst that started my downward spiral. I was obviously already an alcoholic but I really let loose after that. When I was still in the hospital more than anything else I wanted to get out of there so I could have some beers. I couldn't even talk but my thoughts were pretty clear and I thought about drinking more than anything else. We had some money saved up and I had just gotten the permission to send Steven Ward my money for a Mexican mule deer hunt with my son. I even had the check written out and had the stroke during supper the night before I was going to put it in the mail.

Once I was out of the hospital I still wasn't allowed to work. Ladders, paintbrushes and lack of complete muscle control don't mix. I had lots of time on my hands and golfing is excellent therapy. My son was doing the best he could as job sight supervisor but the jobs weren't getting done quickly enough and the money was dwindling. After a couple weeks I knew I was good enough to go back to work but I was enjoying my drunken golf therapy so I milked it as long as I could.

Before I knew it I was out of money and still kept screwing around instead of working. It progressively got worse and worse. I think back on those times and wish I'd have done things differently but I can't change it now and I'm glad I have finally been able to get sober.

In case you're wondering, the doctors say I am now healthy as a horse. Just went in last week for a checkup. The only lasting side effect is my short term memory. I have to write myself notes for everything. Aaaand now that I'm sober, my golf game is better than ever!

From: Amoebus
26-Sep-18
CD - "Aaaand now that I'm sober, my golf game is better than ever!"

Wonderful! I mean that. Some people don't survive to get that 2nd chance and a lot more don't take advantage of it. Keep up the effort to be better each day. You have some missed (good) years with your wife/son to make up for.

26-Sep-18
Excellent. I wandered why you never responded to the PM I sent you when you announced you had a stroke. I assumed then that you indeed had a severe problem. You had been clear to me of your habitat in earlier posts. Being there and done that, I knew where you were and, sent that in love as advice. Not meant in a condescending tone. Continue to Lean on the Lord. I heard you talk of him many times. Live it too. Your love and dedication to him will keep you sober.

I applaud you for being real with yourself and, doing the right thing for you and yours. Put your faith in God and, never look back. I'm so happy hearing this. God Bless man

From: Will
26-Sep-18
Awesome to see you guys get free of that stuff! AWESOME!

A great gift for yourselves, your families, and all you encounter.

And if the golf game is better - that's a bonus as well!

From: Hunting5555
26-Sep-18
"Kelly passed this year" Are you meaning Kelly Harris from Ohio that we all would follow his "Kelly's Great Adventure" deer hunts on here every year and he worked for Coors brewery? I hope we are talking about two different people....

From: mn_archer
26-Sep-18
nope same Kelly.

he broke his neck diving into a pool and never recovered

From: Hunting5555
26-Sep-18
Oh wow..... I sure didn't know that. So sorry for his family.

From: Amoebus
26-Sep-18
Hunt5555 - yes, same one. Also shared his daughter's fight with cancer over the years. Like mn_archer, my eyes seem to be leaking now.

From: SB
01-Oct-18
27 yrs. sober this last April. I was as bad as they come. Just wish I had come to my senses sooner.

From: Mint
02-Oct-18
Congrats to all you guys that quit. You can do it!

I lost one of my best friends when he was 43. It has been ten years and the ache still doesn't go away. What could I have done to help him? we were busy setting up an intervention when he passed. I miss him every single day.

My Granfather was an alcoholic so i have always been very careful to limit my drinking. Never drank at home alone and made sure never drank more than once a week. This really paid off when idonated my kidney to my wife, the Dr said it was pristine and the healthest kidney he has ever seen. So maybe God had a plan.

02-Oct-18
God’s always got a plan. As you proved, when you follow it, nothing but good comes from it. We get in trouble when we don’t. God Bless men

From: Will
02-Oct-18
Way to go SB

Hunting, as others noted, yes, that same Kelly. I believe it was a freak accident while swimming. His daughter posted info a few times, which was hard to read. I never met Kelly, but his contributions to bowsite were some that I really enjoyed over the years. Sad to see him gone, and very sad for his family.

From: Scar Finga
02-Oct-18
Well done and God bless you guys that are doing it one day at a time! Kelly was a good man, and a good father! He is truly missed by many!

God bless his family and friends!

From: Crusader dad
10-Feb-19
Yes, I’m still an alcoholic and yes I still go to my meetings. This past Friday I had the opportunity to share my story at a local meeting. If you’re interested in hearing it I posted it on Facebook. My profile is public so if you have Facebook you can search Shane Honore and it will come up. Grab a cup of coffee and check it out. Life is sooo much better now.

From: bad karma
10-Feb-19
Way to go, Crusader Dad.

I had a client who died before his 30th birthday of cirrhosis of the liver and know of two more not much older. And a friend's niece at 38 carries oxygen now for COPD because of pot smoking.

Another died in her forties by rupturing a vein in her stomach from severe binge drinking.

Moderation, moderation, moderation, and for some, it must be abstinence.

From: HA/KS
10-Feb-19
Thank you for the update. It brightens what was already a great morning.

From: KSflatlander
10-Feb-19
Way to climb that mental Mount Everest. Keep climbing Shane. Much respect.

From: Dale06
10-Feb-19
Genetics must play a part in this. My dad drank and grandfathers both drank in moderation. My brothers do, as do I and my two grown kids. Also, my wife. We have a few drinks a week. That’s it. No alcohol related problems. And like most, I’ve seen it kill people at a young age.

From: Owl
10-Feb-19
A real Romans 8:28 moment, Shane. A sober addict knows no defeat.

From: slade
10-Feb-19
Great news Shane, hopefully someone else will be moved by your actions..........

From: jjs
10-Feb-19
Spent 5 years working at a VA psych/med unit and 85% of the vets that were there was from ETHO related health issues, brandy went to the brain and hard liquor went to the liver. Some were Drs.,CPAs,Attorneys, Professors and Blue Collar, didn't matter it left an destructive toll on the person and families. Myself, had lost several good friends to this problem which took their lives in the early 40s, I stopped with marriage and kids and God but they continued.

I salute you all that have or are climbing out of this disease, life is way too short and as Owl stated it is so true.

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