In the garden of Eden, lay Adam......complacently stroking his madam.... and loud was his mirth, for on all of Earth, were only two balls......and he had'em!!
As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.
He asked, "What are those clocks?"
St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks, and everyone on earth has a Lie-Clock.
Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move."
"Oh," said the man. "Who's clock is that?"
St. Peter answered, "That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."
"Incredible," said the man.
"That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only told two lies his entire life."
"Where is Joe Biden's clock?"
St. Peter answered, "His clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."
Unknown author
Same with Miss Dana and others. They are besides themself with TDS. Definitely a May funny.
Nomad @ work's Link
blacktail's Link
A few years after his failed election I was listening to a story about a trick his son (a elk hunter) played on the SS staff. Apparently, he was hunting in a remote area and the SS didn't have the equipment or desire to go up the mountain and watch over Ford's son. The guide brought him back draped over a horse stating that someone had shot him. When the SS saw this he exclaimed: "Oh my Job!" instead of the more appropriate "Oh my God!" I miss those days...
